In case you were wondering…

MTV will soon bring the reality show “Jersey Shore” to basic cable. Yeah. It’s happening.

What’s with the douchebag craze? Maybe it’s just me but I don’t think society should encourage people like this, no matter the comedic value. But come to think of it, I guess the “Real Housewives” franchise does the same thing except for instead of Guidos, its vapid, soulless golddigging bitches.

Tomato, tomahto?

Rescuers Down Under

On a Tuesday that marks the release of Sarah Palin’s sure to be entertaining autobiography — if not in a sad, laughable way — it’s hard not to post something about her, or about the countless peeks and leaks about the book that have already been let out. Alas, I feel that my posts have been too political as of late, so I’ll go with something else that is very dear to me, the demise of douchebag culture.

According to today’s news clipping, found courtesy of HCwDB, some Aussies are making serious headway in combatting an infestation that has plagued their nation for years. No, I’m not talking about the Cane Toad, this is a problem that America suffers from too — the douchebag.

A prominent Melbourne club promoter has outlawed “Ed Hardy. Skinny jeans. V-neck shirts. Pointed white shoes. Polo shirts with the collars up… ‘metrosexual’ attire… tight T-shirts, shirts with numbers on them, as well as men sporting either blond tips or dyed rats tails.”

To you, Melbourne, I say bravo, maybe the United States can take a page out of your play book. And, to the Americans who believe that Aussies are all a bunch of kangaroo riding, didgeridoo playing, descendents of convicts, you’re wrong — they’re just douchebags like you.

AND

The real question is, which infestation is worse?

Douchebags!

GQ has put out a highly amusing and surprisingly accurate list that purports to expose America’s 25 douchiest institutions of undergraduate study*. In compiling the list, GQ has named the specific subtype of douchiness of which the college is guilty, the symptoms caused by said type of douchitude, what douchey things graduates will be doing 10 years from now, and other institutions that deserve mention within a particular category of douchiness– for example, though UVA wins top honors for home of the ‘blue-blazer [southern country-club] douche’, it is undeniable that Sewanee and Vanderbuilt merit recognition under that heading.

Now, my plan had been to find a good picture of a douchebag on google end the post there. If you go ahead and type ‘douchebag’ into Google, however, you’ll understand when I say that some of the stuff I ran across was just too good not to share with you:

1. Here’s an article from a local paper called B that outlines the anatomy of the a douchebag on differing degrees along the douchebag spectrum. For a little context, Baltimore is not only home to little old me, but also a veritable cesspool of extreme douchebags. The city breeds them. I hypothesize that this is due to the fact that its Mid-Atlantic location makes it a centralized meeting place for all manner of douchery– from those who still have lawn jockeys and claim the Confederate flag is just an expression of regional pride, to those who summer anywhere (‘the Vineyard’ or Nantucket, more often then not), to the New Jersey guido, to Baltimore’s own Lax Brah.’ If you think I’m off the mark, though, then please feel free to share your theories with me.
2. Las Vegas, so troubled by the current economic situation, actually launched a marketing campaign that celebrates the douchebag. I kid you not. If you score high enough on the douchebag quiz, they give you coupons. In true douchebag fashion, the posterboy for the initiative has a particularly douchey MySpace page. Yeah. MySpace.
3. OfficialDatingResource.com** terms douchebaggery a medical condition. It has a full write up of causes, symptoms, and treaments for Douchebag Syndrome, WebMD style***.
4. How could I make this post without mentioning www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com. Go. It’s brilliant. Just go.

*As an avid Tar Heels fan, I particularly love that the feature claims that though Duke deserves the number one Douche spot, they didn’t want to make Duke number one at anything.

** I didn’t know anyone needed an official dating resource, but hey, should that need arise, I guess we’re all covered.

*** I don’t want to be sexist, so here is OfficialDatingResource.com’s write up on Princess syndrome, the affliction that they claim to be the female equivalent of douchebaggery.